LA Kings Player Power Rankings – Week 25


We interrupt these very important Power Rankings to congratulate The Royal Half on the birth of his first child: Dustin Drew Anze Luc Half. We hereby bestow an honorary No. 1 ranking on little Baby Half to celebrate the occasion.

1 Drew Doughty – Doughty isn’t losing sleep over his Norris candidacy but that’s only because he preoccupied with whether or not Reggie can knock off the heavy favorite Gustl in Bark Madness. (Last week: 1)
2 Jeff Carter – Now that his BFF Mike Richards has been recalled, I fully expect Carter to go on a goal-scoring surge. Anything less than consecutive hat tricks will be a disappointment. (Last week: 2)
3 Anze Kopitar – Anze must not be getting much sleep with his newborn in the house. I can tell, not because his play has fallen off a bit, but rather he has developed dark rings under his eyes. (Last week: 3)
4 Jonathan Quick – Eddie Lack does realize that Quick absolutely would’ve ended him had the refs let them fight, right? We all know Quick has a bit of a reputation. (Last week: 4)
5 Marian Gaborik – Now sure would be a good time for Gabo to go on one of his crazy “eight goals in six games” tears. (Last week: 6)
6 Tyler Toffoli – The good news is that Toffoli won’t be suspended for his boarding on Burrows. Still no news though on whether or not his parents will ground him though. (Last week: 5)
7 Dustin Brown – The Power Rankings have few rules, but one of them is that if you drop the hammer on Corey Perry, you get bumped up the rankings, guaranteed. (Last week: 8)
8 Justin Williams – A clutch late goal from Williams to salvage a point against the Ducks. If only the rest of the Kings had flipped into playoff-mode like Williams clearly has. (Last week: 9)
9 Andrej Sekera – Sekera has been a great addition to the Kings because of his skating ability and strong play on both ends. However, I think his biggest contribution is that he gives Kings fans someone besides Kopitar to complain about not taking enough shots. (Last week: 11)
10 Jake Muzzin – I’m wondering if Sutter might not scratch Muzzin once Martinez comes back, you know, just for old times’ sake. (Last week: 10)
11 Trevor Lewis – Lewis failed to score against John Gibson last week. I don’t even know what’s right anymore. (Last week: 7)
12 Alec Martinez – Martinez looks as if he’ll return this week to try and use those magical jazz hands to get the Kings back into a playoff spot. (Last week: 13)
13 Kyle Clifford – Clifford didn’t pick up any points last week, but he also didn’t get his face caved in by anyone. Consider the week a push. (Last week: 12)
14 Brayden McNabb – Even though he’s done everything asked of him and steadily improved all season long, there is little doubt that McNabb will be the D-man removed from the lineup when Martinez comes back. (Last week: 15)
15 Dwight King – Remember when Dwight King used to be able to register points? Yeah, those were good time. Ah, memories. (Last week: 14)
16 Jordan Nolan – Further proof that I don’t know what’s right anymore: Jordan Nolan making a nice play to set up a game-winning goal. What’s next? Human sacrifice. Dogs and cats living together… mass hysteria! (Last week: 17)
17 Jarret Stoll – Still no Stoll. Kings now stall. (Last week: 16)
18 Matt GreeneMatt Greene wearing a green jersey is literally the most literal thing you will see this week. (Last week: 18)
19 Robyn Regehr – Now, if there was any justice in this world, Regehr would be the one wearing street clothes when Martinez comes back. But he won’t, because “veteran.” (Last week: 19)
20 Martin Jones – If Jones doesn’t start one of the back-to-backs this week, we might never see him again. (Last week: 20)
21 Andy Andreoff – Not only did he score his first career goal, but that goal was a huge game-winner over the Yotes. Good job, Andreoff. I always liked you and certainly never made dozens of snarky comments about you in previous editions of the Power Rankings. (Last week: 23)
22 Nick Shore – Shore has been called the eventual replacement for Jarrett Stoll. Considering his sudden knack for untimely offensive zone penalties, I’d say that Shore is the perfect replacement. (Last week: 21)
23 Jamie McBain – Buried on the depth chart, buried in the Power Rankings. (Last week: 22)

Agree? Disagree? I don’t really care! If you still feel compelled to sound off on the rankings, go ahead and leave a comment. It’s a free world.

Garrett Wilson is a lifelong LA Kings fan who now finds himself trapped in the hockey wasteland of the Pacific Northwest. He's an Ivy League graduate, but not from one of the impressive ones. You shouldn't make him angry. You wouldn't like him when he is angry. The again, you probably wouldn't like him when he's not angry either. You should probably follow Garret Wilson on Twitter @Garrett_MWAH