LA Kings Player Power Rankings – Week 24


These aren’t actually the Power Rankings. These are the almost Power Rankings. We’re just hanging out one point shy of the real Power Rankings. Everyone just assumes that we’ll eventually make it to the Power Rankings, but time is running out. So enjoy these kind of, sort of but not really Power Rankings.

1 Drew Doughty – Doughty didn’t get more than 28:35 in ice time in any game last week. Doesn’t Sutter know that the Norris is on the line? 35+ TOI every night! (Last week: 1)
2 Jeff Carter – I suppose it would be gauche of me to trumpet Doughty for the Norris and follow that up by promoting Carter for the Hart in the very next comment. Yes, I definitely won’t point out how Carter is tied for the team lead in scoring and carried the Kings offense for weeks at a time and just how valuable that is. Some might even say the most valuable. But I’m not going to bring that topic up. Nope. Not me. (Last week: 3)
3 Anze Kopitar – Congratulations on becoming a father, Anze! See? Good things do happen when you shoot more. I meant shots on goal… don’t be gross. (Last week: 2)
4 Jonathan Quick – Don’t worry, Jon. Even elite goaltenders can’t stop their own team from scoring on them. (Last week: 5)
5 Tyler Toffoli – It is going to be so embarrassing the first time Kopitar mistakes Toffoli for his newborn and tries to change his diaper right in the middle of the locker room. (Last week: 4)
6 Marian Gaborik – An empty net goal! From the Kings! Do you believe in miracles? YES!!!! (Last week: 6)
7 Trevor Lewis – Trevor Lewis has more assists this season than he had points all of last season and yet the Kings are still just on the outside of the playoff picture. I don’t get it. (Last week: 7)
8 Dustin Brown – Isn’t it nice to have a quality team captain who doesn’t shrink in big games and tell the GM to shut his mouth? Why do I bring that up? No reason. (Last week: 8)
9 Justin Williams – Williams had back-to-back multi-point games last week. Methinks he smells the playoffs coming. (Last week: 10)
10 Jake Muzzin – It is nice to that Muzzin has learned to skip the middle man and instead of committing a dumb turnover that leads to a goal, he’s just scoring the goals on his own team by himself. (Last week: 9)
11 Andrej Sekera – It took a little bit, but Sekera finally got his first points as a King. That’s Dean Lombardi’s cue to sign him to a five-year extension now. (Last week: 14)
12 Kyle Clifford – I guess you could say that Clifford buried Colorado in an… (•_•)( •_•)>⌐■-■ (⌐■_■) …Avalanche of goals. YEEEEAAAAHHH!!! (Last week: 13)
13 Alec Martinez – Martinez could return to action this week, but I’d like to see him held out until next Tuesday in MSG if only to troll Rangers fans. BAH GOD! THAT’S ALEC MARTINEZ’S MUSIC!!! (Last week: 12)
14 Dwight King – Dwight King’s game has been missing so long I saw his face on the side of a milk carton the other day. On a related note, I am now terrified to look at milk cartons. (Last week: 11)
15 Brayden McNabb – There’s no way that Sutter can sit McNabb with how well he’s been playing of late, right? I mean, I know he’s Sutter, but even he can’t justify that, right? (Last week: 16)
16 Jarret Stoll – Stoll is out with an “undisclosed ailment,” but I’ll go ahead and disclose it as being a bad case of “one point in the last 21 games.” (Last week: 15)
17 Jordan Nolan – An amazing thing happened last week: Nolan got 14+ minutes of ice time in consecutive games and nobody complained. (Last week: 20)
18 Matt Greene – I can’t think of any bumbling plays Greene made this week, so I guess that means he had a good week. (Last week: 18)
19 Robyn Regehr – Now, sitting Regehr… there’s an idea we can all get behind. He really looks like he needs about 14 games worth of rest. (Last week: 17)
20 Martin Jones – Jones plays so infrequently that I hope the other guys at least chat with him while he sits on that sad little back-up goalie bench. I worry that he might be getting lonesome. (Last week: 19)
21 Nick Shore – Delay of game penalty on a face off? How about instead of a two-minute minor, the next time Shore does it we take his face off. (Last week: 21)
22 Jamie McBain – All scratch, all the time. (Last week: 22)
23 Andy Andreoff – Andy Andreoff getting ice time against a top opponent during a critical playoff push. This never would’ve happened if Mike Richards were still alive. (Last week: 23)

Agree? Disagree? I don’t really care! If you still feel compelled to sound off on the rankings, go ahead and leave a comment. It’s a free world.

Garrett Wilson is a lifelong LA Kings fan who now finds himself trapped in the hockey wasteland of the Pacific Northwest. He's an Ivy League graduate, but not from one of the impressive ones. You shouldn't make him angry. You wouldn't like him when he is angry. The again, you probably wouldn't like him when he's not angry either. You should probably follow Garret Wilson on Twitter @Garrett_MWAH