LA Kings Player Power Rankings – Week 22

PowerRankings-02

It’s trade deadline day so you are probably already wasting your precious work time constantly refreshing some trade deadline tracker or blog. Why not just totally give into the lack productivity and read some Power Rankings? I promise to alert you if the Kings trade Mike Richards.

RANK PLAYER COMMENT
1 Drew Doughty – Mark Giordano is hurt? Looks like the NHL needs a new leading candidate for the Norris. Might I make a suggestion? (Last week: 1)
2 Jeff Carter – Even with a two-goal game from Carter, it turns outs that That 70s Line can only carry the Kings for so long. (Last week: 2)
3 Anze Kopitar – Hey, Anze…

/poke, poke

The Kings lost three in a row and are on the outside of the playoffs again.

/poke, poke

C’mon!

/poke, poke

Do something.

(Last week: 3)

4 Tyler Toffoli – The best part about almost being past the trade deadline is it provides a temporary reprieve from idiot fans of other teams who actually think the Kings would give up Toffoli in a trade. (Last week: 4)
5 Jonathan Quick – Quick was quite elite in February. March, however, not so much. (Last week: 6)
6 Marian Gaborik – Trading for a Slovak at the deadline worked so well for Lombardi last season, who could blame him for trying again this year. It would’ve been nice if he could’ve gotten that Slovak from Columbus again, but they are fresh out. (Last week: 6)
7 Trevor Lewis – Dating back to last post-season, three of Trevor’s last 10 goals have come against John Gibson. (Last week: 8)
8 Dustin Brown – Dustin Brown doesn’t think the Kings have a consistency problemOH REALLY? (Last week: 9)
9 Justin Williams – The Kings got stoned by the Hamburglar last week, but it was only because of a some clown referee’s quick whistle negating what should’ve been a Williams goal that really made us all Grimace. (Last week: 10)
10 Dwight King – The That 70s Line magic has worn off and Dwight King has started playing like Dwight King again. (Last week: 7)
11 Jake Muzzin – Muzzin is this week’s nominee for the “no goals in a month” jinx breaker. Please note that this jinx does not apply to goals scored by the other team as a direct result of Muzzin making a stupid turnover. (Last week: 11)
12 Alec Martinez – He’s been out a month, but he still just has “concussion-like symptoms” and not an actual concussion. Guys, I hate to break it to you, but I think the jig is up. (Last week: 12)
13 Kyle Clifford – At first, Clifford’s five-year extension seemed way too long, but then I realized that Clifford is 24 years old. He only looks like a 34-year old. (Last week: 15)
14 Jarret Stoll – I just imagine Stoll sitting in the locker room and hearing the news of other impending free agent bottom six forwards on his team getting contract extensions and frantically checking his texts and VMs to see if he missed a message from his agent or something. (Last week: 13)
15 Robyn Regehr – Regehr went from 22+ minutes of ice time per game before the Sekera trade, to about 17 minutes of ice time after the trade. This deal is already paying for itself. (Last week: 14)
16 Brayden McNabb – I don’t know if I’m more shocked that McNabb finally scored a goal or that McNabb actually took a slapshot that ended up on net. (Last week: 17)
17 Matt Greene – Are we so sure that McNabb should be the one getting kicked out of the lineup when Alec Martinez returns? (Last week: 16)
18 Martin Jones – Personally, I think Quick got himself pulled deliberately against the Jets because he felt bad about how little Jones had played recently. (Last week: 20)
19 Jordan Nolan – Nolan goes on the first goal-scoring surge of his professional career and gets a three-year contract extension out of it. Timing is everything. (Last week: 18)
20 Nick Shore – The fourth line has been playing quite a bit later the last few weeks and one can’t help but believe that it has a lot to do with the presence of Shore, even though he doesn’t have many points. Oops! That was a serious comment, sorry. Just pretend I made a dick joke instead. (Last week: 19)
21 Andrej Sekera – We rank Sekera low in part because he is new to the team but also because the Sek-ERA is off to an 0-3-0 start. (Last week: 24)
22 Jamie McBain – Thanks for coming out, Jamie, but you’ve been replaced by Sekera and your services are no longer needed. Oh, this has happened before? Well, this is awkward. (Last week: 21)
23 Andy Andreoff – I suppose there is a chance Andreoff could get traded today, but he’s probably been healthy scratched from the trade block, too. (Last week: 22)
24 Derek Forbort – Forbort returns to the minors, but since he never actually took the ice for the Kings, we must ask: Did Forbort ever really leave the minors? (Last week: 23)

Agree? Disagree? I don’t really care! If you still feel compelled to sound off on the rankings, go ahead and leave a comment. It’s a free world.

Garrett Wilson is a lifelong LA Kings fan who now finds himself trapped in the hockey wasteland of the Pacific Northwest. He's an Ivy League graduate, but not from one of the impressive ones. You shouldn't make him angry. You wouldn't like him when he is angry. The again, you probably wouldn't like him when he's not angry either. You should probably follow Garret Wilson on Twitter @Garrett_MWAH