In an effort to keep Los Angeles Kings fans aware of the comings and goings of the other teams in the Smythe Pacific Division… we here at The Royal Half have created the Pacific War Room… a wrap-up of the past week in the Pacific from some of the best and brightest bloggers who cover Pacific Division teams. In order of the Pacific Division standings… we present the Pacific War Room for the week of December 5th, 2014!


1st PLACE, 18-7-1, 37 POINTS
@PetBugs13 from Canucks Army

Well, your loveable Canucks are have way through a seven game road trip through the ECHL* and have just completed the American portion of trip with a 3-1 record, including two shut-outs.

USA NUMBER ONE indeed. This brings back some memories:


Ahhhhh. Good times.

But back to reality. The Canucks started off the trip with a 5-0 win over the hapless Columbus Blue Jackets, who have been decimated by injuries. Just last week, Mark Letestu was the most recent BJ to go down, making him the eighth in a year and half to need abdominal surgery. Not sure what it means for their conditioning regimen, but the evidence is pretty clear that nobody can stomach playing in Columbus:


First appeared at The Sporting News.

From there, the Canucks moved on to Detroit Rock Bottom City, where hilariously, the lights went out one shift into the game, making for all kinds of “Detroit is so broke…” jokes.

Not so hilariously, the Canucks also suffered some sort of power outage and came escaped with nothing but a 5-3 loss and an invoice for their half of the electric bill for the game.

The road trip continued to Washington, D.C., the most populous American city that is not found in a U.S. state. Something those 11 year old brainiacs on Jeopardy couldn’t figure out. I weep for the state of the American education system. Thanks Obama!

Anyway, your loveable road warriors handily defeated the Caps 4-3, and by handily, I mean hung on by their fingernails after letting them back into the game. But that winner. Wow.

You’ll notice at the start of that clip that Ryan Miller was in net for the Canucks. That was a bit unexpected, as the indications had been that Eddie Lack would get the start. Apparently Ryan had a little chat with head coach Willie Desjardins and convinced him that it wouldn’t be fair to Eddie to put him in after having such a long layoff. Or something like that.

All I know is, we have ourselves another GOOOAL-IIIIIEEEE CONT-TROOOO-VERSYYYYYYY:


It’s getting a bit tiring. But hey, if you think the Canucks have goaltending problems, you’re going to love this:


First appeared at The Sporting News.

Good times in the Bestern Conference.

Anyway, back to Eddie Lack. Don’t worry, he finally got his start last night against one of the NHL’s most feared offensive teams, the Pittsburgh Penguins. He also got a little encouragement from the best mom in hockey:

And sure enough, the Penguins, in some kind of weird, interspecies sexual transmogrification put up a goose egg as Eddie Lack backstopped the Canucks to a 3-0 win.

Bring on Leastern Canada.

* Eastern Conference Hockey League


2nd PLACE, 16-6-5, 37 POINTS

What an exciting week for the Ducks, assuming you’re a fan of fluctuating rosters and constant injuries. Going into Friday’s game against the Blackhawks, already John Gibson, Ben Lovejoy, and Mark Fistric were injured, while Clayton Stoner was exhibiting mump-like symptoms, probably trying to fit in to his new team. Bryan Allen got traded, then word came that Francois Beauchemin had a broken hand, and suddenly Anaheim was playing with six blueliners all born in the 1990s! Needless to say, that’s not an ideal lineup against the Blackhawks, and the Ducks dropped that game pretty convincingly.

So GM Bob Murray went to the phones and brought in an experienced body to play with all the defense-children, Eric Brewer from the Lightning. Brewer was able to play two games with Anaheim before breaking his foot blocking a shot. Oops! And in that timeframe, somehow second-backup-goalie Jason LaBarbera managed to break his hand, too.

So in re-response, Murray brought in former Mighty Duck Ilya Bryzgalov in for a PTO tryout – we’ll see if he signs a real contract – and even made another defenseman trade, landing Colby Robak from the Panthers. Robak may or may not be very good, but he has two unbroken feet, two unbroken hands, and zero mumps. So far.

The Ducks dropped games against the Blackhawks and Sharks, but did salvage the week with wins against Boston and Philadelphia. The Flyers did tie the game in the last two seconds of regulation (you guys remember Wayne Simmonds, right?), but the Ducks still won in the shootout. That’s really no big deal – it’s December 5, and the Flyers haven’t won a shootout yet in calendar year 2014.

And, oh yeah. Haha, Kings.


3rd PLACE, 17-8-2, 36 POINTS
@BookOfLoob from Flames Nation



4th PLACE, 14-7-5, 33 POINTS
@PumperNicholl from The Royal Half

It was another fun* week being a fan of the LA Kings!

*fun only applies to hockey games

The Kings got blown out 4-1 by the Chicago Blackhawks in a Western Conference Final rematch that was sure to steal the headlines surrounding the team all week long…

Oh for the love of…

*possible shot of Dean Lombardi prepping his statement*

Yeah … this topic has been had covered ad nauseum by others.
Just dumb.

Optional skate topics aside, the Kings decided that they weren’t going to allow any more goals the rest of the week, which was nice for everyone involved.

Shutouts against the Boston Bruins and Arizona Coyotes mean that Jonathan Quick and Martin Jones have now combined for a 14-7-5 record with a 1.97 GAA, .936 SV% and 5 shutouts.

But the happiest news of the week came when Lombardi announced that Jazz Handing Alec Martinez had been re-signed to a 6-year, $24 million contract.

This, naturally, made everyone at #TeamTRH giddy as schoolgirls.

Coming up on Saturday is the all-too-likely letdown versus the Philadelphia Flyers.

But at least we get another chance to see this!

Carter Richards intro - The Royal Half

Thanks forever, Flyers!


5th PLACE, 13-10-4, 30 POINTS
@stace_ofbase from Battle of California

Note: I’m currently sitting at Los Angeles International Airport waiting to board my flight. I thought it would be a brilliant idea to write this at 5:30am while I wait at the terminal, turns out, I was wrong. The person directly across from me is mouth breathing and I can smell their breath and I want to die. This post won’t have any bells and whistles so those of you kings fans who have trouble reading, I’m sorry, no pictures today. The good news is that the San Jose Sharks are back to being the greatest team in the known universe and I knew they had it in them all along! ISOTOPES BABY! WE’RE NUMBER ONE!

San Jose Sharks vs. Anaheim Ducks, 6-4

Apparently, before this game even started, Logan Couture was sick and dying in the hospital but he ended up playing anyway. I know most people say it’s because he’s #HockeyTuff but I like the storyline that he’s a moron more. Whatever cold medicine he was on, I would like some, because he had a phenomenal game. He scored two goals 4 minutes apart in the first period to give the Sharks the lead. By the sixth minute of the second period, the Sharks were ahead 5-1!!! Against the Ducks. Tears of joy ran down my cheeks until they eventually dried out my face. Then the Sharks did Shork things and Anaheim managed to crawl their way back into the game. My hands were covering my face the entire third period. Long Beach Native Matt Nieto got the insurance goal and I put my emergency inhaler away. Haha suck it, Ducks.

San Jose Sharks vs. Philadelphia Flyers, 2-1

Ugh, I hate nationally televised games. Nothing is more nerve-racking than other fan bases watching your team be embarrassing. The Flyers held the lead for most of the game thanks to a goal scored by Sean Couturier. This was painful because Andrew MacDonald had a beautiful pass leading up to that goal. So. Sharks. A majority of the game they made Steve Mason look like a vezina contender. Thankfully, at the end of the second, Vlasic tied it up. Ugh, another 3 point game..I hate this team, they suc-WAIT! Matt Nieto the Long Beach wonder scored with 11 seconds left and won the game? THIS DOES NOT HAPPEN! Like ever. Haha suck it, Flyers.

San Jose Sharks vs. Boston Bruins, 7-4

This game was F U N! I missed part of it because I was packing but I missed the bad part where the Sharks gave up two goals in the first 3 minutes of the game. Good. lord. What is with this team? They drive me fucking crazy. The Sharks scored 3 goals in the first 7 minutes of the second period, two of which, from Tommy Wingels. I love him SO much. I tend to fixate on one player each season and this season it’s good ol’ Tommy boy. I love that juicebox drinkin man child. He’s my angel. The game was ridiculously back and forth throughout the rest of the second period and then Boston stopped trying in the third. San Jose scored three unanswered goals, well technically two. MILAN LUCIC OWN GOAL HAHAHAHAH. What a fucking loser. Suck it, Bruins.


This weekend the Sharks head up north for a back-to-back against the Alberta teams. Calgary is “good” and Edmonton is bad (no quotation marks needed, they’re actually bad). You know who else is going to Alberta? ME! That is why I’m at the airport! /FULL CIRCLE

I’m spending the weekend with fellow war room writers Floob and Jeanshorts! We are going to both of the games, and since I am in attendance, Edmonton will surely end their losing streak.


6th PLACE, 10-14-3, 23 POINTS
@brendanporter from Five For Howling

The Arizona Coyotes were struggling. They had lost five straight while demonstrating a near total inability to score. Their defense couldn’t hold leads, and their goaltenders were conceding goals they shouldn’t be. Something had to change in this desparate hour.

Wait, I hear something. Off in the distance. It’s getting closer. My God…


Arizona fans discovered what it is to win a game, beating the Oilers 5-2 at Rexall Place. Unfortunately, Arizona had to return to playing NHL teams the very next day, as they went to Calgary to play the Flames.

They lost 5-2. Some called for changes to be made:

Arizona’s goaltending problems are Humongous Big

But no changes were to be had. Arizona would simply have to knuckle down and take it to the Los Angeles Kings like they did earlier in the season.

They lost 4-0.

B.J. Crombeen, Krys Barch, Paul Bissonnette. How many more do we need for the whole set?

Arizona gets Boston to round out the week, and another five months to not be bad enough to get Connor McDavid. Hooray.


7th PLACE, 6-15-5, 17 POINTS
@JSBMjeanshorts from Oilers Nation

The Oilers had ONE job to do against Winnipeg with less than 3 minutes left in the game and a one goal lead.

The Jets ended up winning in overtime and the bottom officially, officially fell out (again).

4 games in a row against San Jose and Anaheim. It’ll be a miracle if they can head into 2015 with 10 wins! I CAN’T WAIT!


Pacific War Room 12.5.14

Thanks to all the amazing Pacific Division Bloggers. Check back next Friday for another edition of Pacific War Room!

You can check out past editions of Pacific War Room here!

PumperNicholl is a lifelong LA Kings fan and actually learned how to speak English from Bob Miller by watching LA Kings games… and the Police Academy movies. You should probably follow PumperNicholl on Twitter @pumpernicholl