TRH RECAP 1: The Star-Mangled Banner

NOTE FROM PumperNicholl: We are beyond excited to welcome ALMSMCQ to the pages of The Royal Half as one of the winners of North America’s Next Top Blogger™: Season 2! ALMSMCQ is the self-proclaimed Queen of Meme and has brought her talents to the runner-up of the LA Weekly Web Awards 2013 Best Sports Blog.

Let’s get to know ALMSMCQ, shall we?

PUMPER: How did you become a fan of the Los Angeles Kings?

ALMSMCQ: I married a life-long Kings fan but I didn’t catch the fever until I surprised him with playoff tickets against the Blues (Game 4) in 2012 and then I was hooked. When I love something, I love it all the way. Finances be damned! We were getting season tickets! But then Finances was all like, you dodged me for two years, beeeyotch, I’m coming back with a vengeance! So now we have been moved to steerage are 10-pack tickets members.

PUMPER: Besides 2 Stanley Cups in 3 Seasons, what is the greatest moment in LA Kings history?

ALMSMCQ: For the organization? Getting Gretzky. For me, what I’ve personally bore witness to? Game 7 against the Sharks this year. I feel like the team pretty much said to the world, take your doubts, take your stats, take your projections and toss it all out. None of that normal crap applies to this team. #Believers will be rewarded.

PUMPER: What is your least favorite part of blog?

ALMSMCQ: I guess I’d have to say the podcasts-ONLY because I don’t listen to them. I love the Gameday, Recap and hilarious tweets because I can consume them easily at work or during the game.

Speaking of recaps, let’s see what ALMSMCQ thought of last night’s game!!

SHARKS 4, KINGS 0 (STANLEY CUPS 2)

Season Opener 0-4 Loss? That’s So Kings™!

Last night Kings fans came together to celebrate the Stanley Cup banner raising and to kick off what we hope will be another year filled the same winning recipe of amazing #GRIT, moments to #BELIEVE and that extra sprinkle of #YOTMB that has lead the team to hoist two Stanley Cups in the last three years.

For Sharks fans it was the season premiere of their own American Horror Story as their team had to endure being there as the Stanley Cup banner was raised high to the rafters of Staples Center. Not “there” in the sense of being present and taking that punch to the face like a stoic warrior that has resigned himself to being bested on the field of battle, but rather “there” as in hiding in the locker room, presumably crying into their “Beat LA” rally towels and still drawing for the short straw to see who will lead their listing, rudderless ship.

And while last night’s ceremony was five days late to be considered an official celebration of National Mean Girls Day, you still gotta slow clap it out for the Queen Bee in the league office who decided that, “No, no the Sharks have not suffered enough. Let’s make them the best man at the wedding where their one true love marries the guy they hate the most.”

wedding

Yikes.

But the Kings boldly refused to play a role torturing the Sharks any further and in one of the most selfless acts I have ever witnessed, they not only allowed the Sharks to win, but even gift wrapped a shutout to bolster their fractured confidence to let the healing begin. With this grand gesture of kindness, the Kings have proven that not only are they true champions, but also the MVPs of compassion. Well done, boys!

Still, it wasn’t just the Kings players who had to take their lumps during last night’s blowout…

HAHAHA you tell ’em, Bailey!!

…ugh.

I’m not sure why some Kings fans are disappointed. We got to see Kyle Clifford fight, some crap penalties, a flaccid powerplay, a patented Jonathan Quick puck bobble that lead to a goal, and we lost a banner ceremony game. These are the traditions we hold dear, people. No wringing of the hands, please. That’s the October 16th game. There will be plenty of REAL opportunities to freak out and gnash your teeth. Last night was not one of them.

Despite this small boost to Shark pride, I think Sunday dinner is still gonna be super awkward for a while as the the Joe Thornton ghost continues to haunt the mansion.

SHARKS FAMILY DINNER

LA Queen of Meme is the self-appointed Queen of Meme. Yeah, yeah, you didn't get to vote on it, but relax, this is a benevolent dictatorship. She's a recent (but pre-Stanley Cup) Kings fan, an LA native and a 12th level PhotoShop sorceress (but spelling and tpyos continue to keep her humble). Likes: Shiny things, giveaway nights, whiskey. Dislikes: Other people. Especially the ones who can't take a joke. You can follow LA Queen of Meme on Twitter @LAQueenOfMeme.