Shots! Shots, Shots, Shots, Shots …on Goal!

Shots on goal.
Shot Song Oal.
Sh Ots Ong Oal.

However you say it, the message is the same: shots on goal. If you have ever wondered how many shots on goal a team has at any given time, now you will always know.

All the time.

Every. Single. Second.

That’s right! For this season, Fox Sports network affiliates have added a shots on goal indicator to the score display-overlay-bug-thing at the top left of your screen. And, since the team with the most shots always wins, and the amount of shots on goal determines definite success 100 percent of the time every single time, it has been met with positive reviews by viewers across the league.

Sure, it’s confusing at first to see the Kings trailing the Coyotes 35-19. This isn’t football, especially not a team with the acronym “LA” playing football, but that’s not the point. Art isn’t always beautiful. Sometimes art tells a story; an ugly, bulky, dumb graphic-type of story.

And, yeah, maybe it is kind of pointless. I mean, why not any other stats like blocked shots, giveaways, zone entries, or something like NASCAR with a constant scroll of every player and their time on ice or Fenwick or whatever.

Who really needs to know the number of shots on goal? Is shots on goal really as important as a pitch count, or number of time outs remaining, or fouls to give? Is knowing the shots on goal giving you an insight on a goalie’s charisma rating?

The answer to all of these questions is, obviously, no.

So, wait, why do we need this? Well, we don’t, not with the coming advent of the World Wide Web. I’m going to need a bit more convincing to think that this is really grabbing the attention of America’s hockey public.

Shots on goal are fun.

Oh boy.

Sure, this is a move to make the games more enjoyable for those watching on television. NFL broadcasts did such a good job with this that NFL attendance dropped at the actual games, or, at least, this is what the NFL would have you believe. So, in the NHL, it’s no different. Instead of just the measly time, score and period indicators, networks look to add any little touch they can. First it was the power play indicator. Then a cool little light up graphic whenever someone scored. Now this.

That’s all well and good, but it could have been executed much better. As the self-appointed resident #TeamTRH Score Graphics Connoisseur and Critic, there does appear to be some design choices that do not make sense. And I feel it is my civic duty to point them out to you.

Look at the empty space between the team names and the score. That’s valuable 0.018 percent of the ice that Fox Sports has taken away from you, the paying customer/bar patron. And why is the SOG indicator on the far side of the graphic? Why not below, or periodically popping up in the bottom corner whenever a team records a shot on goal? Heck, South Park can do it, why can’t Fox Sports? That’s just another 0.103 percent of your screen taken up by a graphic that, most night, the Kings do not even use.

Or, if the graphic must remain the same, why not switch it so the score is on the outside? What did they tell you in school: audiences only remember the first and last presentations, everything in the middle is difficult to recall. That’s, like, science and junk. Shouldn’t that work the same with graphics. Teams and goals on the outside, no sense changing the rules in the middle of the game.

Overall, the biggest complaint about the shots on goal graphic is obvious. It’s already been done, and spectacularly, I might add.

Fox Sports, don’t steal Duke’s thunder. It’s all he has left.

Also, as many opponents of advanced stats will tell you… sometimes the numbers don’t tell the whole story.

1Goal0ShotsLA-PHX

I know That 70s Line is great at scoring… but this is getting ridiculous.

And if destroying one Twitter user’s way of life isn’t enough to sway you to change the shots on goal counter, just look at this.

Quit scaring Willie Mitchell, Fox Sports. He has enough problems as it is.

Flubber McGee is TRH's resident Kansas City correspondent, and has survived as a Kings fan long before the dawn of Internet streaming sites. He has seen the Kings win exactly zero non-exhibition games in person. Have you ever achieved enlightenment? Flubber has, because he once witnessed Kevin and Brett Westgarth fight in, and get kicked out of, the same game (they didn't fight each other, unfortunately). In addition to being a part of TRH, Flubber runs a Kansas City hockey blog. It's exactly what you think it is. You can follow Flubber McGee on Twitter @FlubberMcGee.