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FREEWAY FARCE: Week 24

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WEEK 24 (Mar 24- Mar 30)

Los Angeles Kings (44-25-6)

GIF That Best Represents the Past Week for the LA Kings:


Feelin’ good

 

#SelkeSmooth:

The #SelkeSmooth hashtag, along with that amazing graphic from THX BUD, surfaced some time before Saturday’s game against the Jets.

And wouldn’t you know it, the hashtag caught on like hot fire!

It even made it on TV:

Oh, people on twitter are going to start claiming their share of the credit for this? What could possibly go wrong?

Uh oh

 

  Yeah, about that …  BaileySelkeSmooth    

 

 

 Well this is going to be awkward, but here is what happened next:

 

And really, that’s the point.

 

Screen Shot 2014-03-30 at 9.35.11 AM

Yup, that bottom one is nearly 2 years ago.

 

 

 

 

Reminder:

Well, that hashtag was fun for about half a night. 

 

#SelkeNotSoSmooth:

While he was flawless on the ice, off the ice Kopitar did have a misstep this week.

How appropriate that Kopitar reminds us that English is still his second language, as he confuses your/you’re. No shame in that though…how many people have homonym trouble on twitter each day, without the “English is my second language” excuse? 

Sorry boss.

And then Dustin Penner reminded us why we miss him:

 

Mighty Ducks of Anaheim (48-18-8)

GIF That Best Represents the Past Week for the Mighty Ducks of Anaheim:

           

 Reporter = Ducks                         Snow plow = Playoffs

 

The Worst of the Worst from @ducksfanzone:

The Ducks played the Canucks this week, which meant really awful back-and-forths between DFZ and Canucks fans.

He’s referring to this:

Shockingly, Canucks fans viewed this situation differently:

Screen Shot 2014-03-30 at 1.21.47 PM

 

RTing angry fans of the opposing team? Who does this guy think he is, any member of Team TRH?

 

Screen Shot 2014-03-30 at 1.22.36 PM

Changing Maroon to Moron? Sick burn. Sick burn.

This led to a heated debate about who would have won the theoretical fight between Maroon and Kassian, because I have no idea why.

Uuuuuuuuffffff… “He’s a our Kassian” may be the worst boast ever.

So you guys decided it’s a draw? OK. Well, thanks for wasting all of our time with that .

#embarrassing 

#snark

Here’s another look at the game tape. Judge for yourself:

1378401004_banana_slips_on_man

Well, at least this debate prevented DFZ from whining about the refs.

 

Tips From the Kitchen:

Borrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr-ing … instead of listening to Kyle Palmieri Nick Bonino Andrew Cogliano (how do Ducks fans keep those three straight?) talk about hemp seeds, you should read about Jersey Brian‘s #SelkeSmooth Cheesecake recipe.

 

SHOOTOUT: WHO WON THE WEEK?

 

First Round, Shocking goal of the week:

Kings: Trevor Lewis

OK, so maybe those goals aren’t so unexpected anymore, but is anybody really thinking that Lewis’ value this offseason will be determined by the number of goals he scores?

Ducks: Saku Koivu

Winner:

The only thing more expected than Dustin Penner scoring against the Kings is the Kings beating the Capitals.

 

Second Round, War of Words:

Kings: Darryl Sutter, via LA Kings Insider

On the officials not awarding Mike Richards a goal in last night’s empty net situation:

They will say it all evens out. I’ve heard it. Once the league has their meetings in Florida in March, even though the rules don’t change, for a while the rules do change. And that’s unfortunate, and we see it. And I’ve seen it for a long time, and I know the answer always is ‘Oh, it’ll all even out.’ Well, that’s not true. I mean, it’s tough for the referees, too, because they’re in a high-pressure environment right now too, because they want to play after April 12th, too. That’s a fact…I mean, there are 16 teams that get to play, and there are a certain amount of the officials that get to play. So I’m sure that they feel a lot of pressure, too.

You really should read that whole post from Jon Rosen. When Darryl Sutter is being candid, he is one of the more interesting voices in the NHL.

Ducks: Teemu Selanne, via LA Times

On WEDNESAY, Teemu Selanne was on the top line,  had four points in a four game stretch, and was feeling so good that he offered to start playing the second half of back-to-backs:

Before the season began, Ducks Coach Bruce Boudreau and Selanne crafted a strategy to give Selanne one game off when the Ducks confronted back-to-back games in what he’s said will be his final season. He’s skipped 10 games already as part of the plan, but current events have him enthused, although he yielded to Boudreau to make the final call. “I’m ready to play,” Selanne said. “But the plan is still going to be what we created early in the season. … That’s his decision. … The plan that we did was not whether I did good or bad. It was created to help everybody [with playing time]. … Let’s see what happens.”

And on FRIDAY, Teemu was demoted from the first line, after the top line struggled against the lowly Flames. Thus ended the three most typical days in Teemu Selanne’s 2013-14 season.

Winner: When Darryl Sutter Doesn’t Feel Like Being Candid

On Dustin Brown’s performance:

Jeez, I thought he was pretty good.

 

Third Round, Video Highlight of the Week:

Kings:

WUT?

Jon Quick Scorpion Save - The Royal Half

 

Ducks:

The Ducks rallied to barely avoid losing two straight games to the Flames … bring on the postseason!

Winner: Brad Richardson

The Canucks are a train wreck, and the even better news is that the former King has 10 goals on the season … as well as still having amazing hair:

Screen Shot 2014-03-30 at 10.59.44 AM

WINNER OF THE WEEK: Bad puns

While everybody is seemingly on board with #SelkeSmooth, NOBODY thinks this is a good idea:

A rambling man, Hrudey can't be tied to any one team. But because he's too cheap for NHL Gamecenter, his NHL universe consists only of Ducks and Kings broadcasts. What he lacks in knowledge of the actual sport of hockey, he makes up for in snark and pop culture references. You can follow Hrudey Can't Fail on Twitter @HrudeyCantFail.
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