KORAB Grit Numbers: Kings-Blackhawks Series Recap, Rangers Games 1 & 2
How about that first period of Game 2 of the Stanley Cup Final, eh?! Hard-hitting, smash mouth, all or nothing. TRUE WARRIORS!
Before we get into that, though, the first half of this post is dedicated to recapping the Kings-Blackhawks series. For the second half we have a special guest KORABer to take us through Games 1 & 2 of the Stanley Cup Final against the New York Rangers, so be sure to stick around for that, or just skip straight to it! It doesn’t matter!
Kings Game 7 KORAB
Blackhawks Game 7 KORAB
Kings Series KORAB
Blackhawks Series KORAB
Theory V: Unfortunately, there is a “ME” in “TEAM”
You all know what happened by now. The Kings win the series, but on the surface, it appears the Blackhawks out-KORABed the Kings during the entirety of the series. But a look back at prior games tells a different story. Therein lies an issue in using an averaging formula to determine Team KORAB.
By removing Sheldon Brookbank’s nearly 58% KORAB number for just one game played, the Blackhawks fall to a 19.5% Team KORAB. This is slightly lower than the Kings’ overall KORAB, and two percentage points below their overall KORAB shown above. This signals a fundamental change in how KORAB numbers should be compiled, with a focus on the totality of stats instead of the average percentages of each player. Also, this proves KORAB appears to work more as a display of individual performance because a player’s KORAB can be misleading in a small sample size. Thus, KORAB truly determines the WARRIORS and GRITTIEST individuals with large samples – i.e. every player on the Kings played all seven games, thus each is a fairly accurate measure of an individual’s style of play – and not necessarily a method of analyzing a team’s true grit.
Lesson learned: advanced stats go through growing pains, and we must adapt and evolve.
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Now, onto the Stanley Cup Final! To take you through Games 1 and 2, I present to you former NHLer, and hockey analyst from his own podcast “Sean Avery Presents,” Mr. Sean Avery! Take it away, Sean!
Two teams I’ve had the honor of playing for. Kings, Rangers. If they had a KORAB stat back in my playing days, I probably would have led the league in it, and be in the record books. The stat books. The Guinness Book of World Records.
I want to start by discussing Game 1.
Kings Game 1 KORAB
Rangers Game 1 KORAB
So, the analysts, the so called experts, the couch pundits, the knowledge aficionados, the rocket scientist brain surgeons, they’ll ask where’s Richie? Where’s Marty? I’m going to tell you, Game 1 of the Finals, hey, it happens. Some games you eat the bear, some games the bear eats you.
Now, let’s talk about Dustin Brown. He’s the captain for the L.A. Probably from Ithaca, New York. Nasty. Nasty man. Nasty man Dustin nasty, the Nasty Man. Look, here’s the analogy I’m going to say to you in writing as I write it right now. Go stand in front of a NASCAR stock car. Now, tell the driver to drive really fast right at you at an alarming rate of speed. You have no idea what’s go to happen, the car could hit you in the leg, in the torso, it could miss you, it could hit you in the balls and knock your balls off. That’s what the Finals are like. It’s terrifying. To do what Brown does each game, it takes balls, balls of steel, beautiful, tanned balls that could get knocked off by a speeding race car. Instead, his balls cause damage.
Let me look at my notes.
I want to transition to the second game now.
Kings Game 2 KORAB
Rangers Game 2 KORAB
Um, this won’t show up in the stats, but Marian Gaborik is fast, but not soft. He’s on right now. No one has to tell him, he knows. Look, I’ve played with him. I can tell. His girlfriend told him to stand in front of the net and scores goals. Meanwhile, he stands in front of the net and scores goals while McDonagh and Boyle are burying their shafts into his girlfr…err, his back. That’s toughness. That’s not on the stat sheet.
I want to transition into my notes.
Listen, I just watched this game in a bordello in upstate New York around a bunch of women – beautiful, gorgeous, tanned women, as far as the eye could see – and the women – did I mention there were women? – they really love…
…oh, my dog is barking at the neighbors sprinklers…
…anyway, as I was saying, just think about Henrik Lundqvist pumping gas into your girlfriend’s beamer. And you’re at the gas station. Your girlfriend would leave you on the spot. Ha ha. But really.
I want to transition into this message from our sponsor. Soobway Soondwhices. Suhhbwuhh Suhhndwuches. Sahhhhhhhbwahhhhhh Sahhhhhhndwaaaaches.
Let me tell you about Jeff Carter and his personal trainer. They’re very close to each other.
That’s the story.
Now New York is happy to go home down two games to Madison Square Garden to look at models. Or, actually, I say put the models behind the away bench. It causes distractions to happen. I always say we need to look at more models behind the bench. No one listens to me, though. But, hey, its hard to play hockey with a boner.
Um, I’d play some music, but, uh, ya know. So…
I want to transition to my good night.
Have a good night. Drive safe. Don’t drink and drive. Buckle your condom. Wear a condom in the carpool lane.