Pundays: Westward, Slow!


The fans of the Boston Bruins and the Tampa Bay Lightning can finally understand what it feels like to be a fan of an NHL team that hasn’t made the playoffs… because they are going to sit around for the next few days and watch every team play except for their own. The Eastern Conference Finals are all locked up. While in the West, the San Jose Sharks and Vancouver Canucks struggle to close out their series. But for serious fans of the NHL… watching the Canucks and Sharks choke in the playoffs is nothing new.

Click here to check out the best and worst NHL.com pun headlines from the 4th week of the NHL playoffs!!!

Of course, the talk of last week was the complete ruination of the Washington Capitals as they were swept by the Tampa Bay Lightning. And our good friends at NHL.com were there for every step of the pun-headline way. 

Alex Semin did a whole lot of nothing in this series.

Remember, Capitals fans, you can’t spell “Sweep” without “Weep.”

It’s safe to say that after this series, Alex Ovechkin will never be mistaken for Mark Messier.

No, if he was Captain Obvious, then he wouldn’t have guaranteed a Game 4 victory.

Sometimes a pun headline is worth a 1000 words. And 1 number.

How bad was it for the Capitals?
NHL.com found it necessary to say twice that the ‘Caps Can’t Close’ on the bottom line.

Meanwhile, up the coast from Tampa Bay, the Boston Bruins were busy exorcising demons from Playoffs Past and opening up a can of whoop-ass on the Philadelphia Flyers.

Funny enough, this is the same headline to describe the Sedin’s scoring prowess in the playoffs so far.

How much of a blowout was the Bruins 4 game sweep of the Flyers? The pun headline writers at NHL.com were so bored they decided to hand the pun headline writing reins over to their AHL team… the fans on Twitter!

That’s right, Pun Master General, NHL Blinn, decided to reach out to the fans on Twitter as the NHL debuted its brand new reality show “Who Wants to Write A Pun Headline!” 

The winning entry as submitted by @sarah_connors, @damnitjason and @theprogramBTR.

But as we all know, the joy of a successful pun-filled NHL.com headline is a fleeting one… as within a few hours your clever pun has been replaced by an even more clever-er one.

Meanwhile, in the Western Conference, apparently the nickname for where the Predators play at home has something to do with the Incredible Hulk.

I think the writers at NHL.com were smashed on something when they came up with this headline.

Ok, that’s more like it.

For a while there, the most interesting thing in the 2nd Round of the NHL Playoffs was to see what NHL.com could come up with in regards to Dwayne Roloson’s name.

But at 41 years old, Roloson’s reign on the top of the pun charts isn’t built to last. And thankfully, this past week, two young stars emerged from the pun-headline pages of the Western Conference.

It’s about time the NHL started tapping into the lucrative “hockey fans who love Queen Latifah movies” market. 

It’s about time the NHL started tapping into the lucrative
hockey fans who love monks that set themselves on fire” market.

Seems like Detroit has set-gotcha the Sharks right where they want them.

If only Freddy Modin had been traded to Nashville at the deadline, we could have Fred Ward.

Happy Mothers Day to all the pun-loving Mothers out there.

And this week’s winner of the “Detroit Red Wings Won’t Die Award”… The Detroit Red Wings!

As always, check out our Pundays Archive located just below the Royal Half banner at the top of the page.

The Royal Half has been a Los Angeles Kings fan since 1988 and a Half-Season Ticket Holder since 2002. He has seen the following goaltenders play in person for the Los Angeles Kings… Kelly Hrudey, Grant Fuhr, Byron Dafoe, Jamie Storr, Stephane Fiset, Felix Potvin, Cristobal Huet, Roman Cechmanek, Mathieu Garon, Adam Hauser, Jason LaBarbera, Barry Brust, Sean Burke, Dan Cloutier, Yutaka Fukufuji, Jean-Sebastien Aubin, Erik Ersberg, Jonathan Bernier, Jonathan Quick, Ben Scrivens and Martin Jones.You can follow The Royal Half on Twitter @TheRoyalHalf.