Pundays: Scoring an Eighth


As we head into the last month of the 2010-2011 NHL season, teams are working harder than ever in an effort to lock up a playoff spot. The team over at the NHL.com Pun Headline Writing Department is no different, as during the last week these players attacked the front page of NHL.com as if they were shot out of a cannon.

Every Which Way but Looch.

Click here to check out the best and worst NHL.com pun headlines from the past week!!!

With the trade deadline behind us, hockey fans everywhere can now turn their attention to the surprising races for the 8th seed in both Conferences. In the East, once thought to be dead on arrival, the New Jersey Devils have dug their way out of the cellar and crawled into the running for a playoff spot. And it’s no coincidence that their spectacular rise from the ashes has been synced up with the spectacular play of a certain pun headline All-Star.

Also the name of a fancy handbag his wife carries.

I can’t imagine the NFL would use the phrase “Killah” on its website.
If NHL.com existed in 1984, they could have used this one for Craig MacTavish.

As we all know, for a team to win, it takes more than one player. Even if that team has tried to waive him during the season.

When the Devils bury his contract in the AHL, this will be Rockford N’ Rolston.

As equally improbable as the Devils chase for the post-season is the possibility of the Toronto Maple Leafs grabbing a playoff spot.

If Brian Burke has a sense of humor he trades Grabovski to the 
Islanders to play with Michael Grabner on the Grab Bag line.

Brian Burke could have made a play for Brad Boyes in order to create the ultimate Boys Club.

Another Cinderella story in the East are the Buffalo Sabres and the Carolina Hurricanes. Both teams have hovered around mediocrity for most of the season, but in recent weeks have really upped the quality of their play… which only leads to more attention from the pun headline writers.

As hockey fans, we may disagree about which team we want in the playoffs,
but we can always agree on how much we love Toto.

I’m surprised this one slipped through. Pretty sure Honda is the official car of the NHL.

Somewhere in Nashville, Joel Ward wonders what a brother has to do to get a “Ward-Something” headline.

And in the Western Conference, teams move so quickly back and forth from the 4th seed to the 8th seed… you need to leap left and right to get out of the way.

If Visnovsky was still on the Kings, I would totally have a “Taking Care of Visness” t-shirt.

Speaking of the Kings, with all the hoopla over Pennertration being the talk of the Trade Deadline, you would think the desire to pun Pennerwould die down.

As a life-long Kings fan, I know he’ll get injured and we’ll have “Penn-cil’s Down” soon enough.

But the Kings were quickly reminded that in order to make the NHL playoffs, you have to be able to beat the elite teams.

What an arresting loss to Vancouver.

The biggest talk of the Western Conference playoff race last week had to be the Chicago Blackhawks and their incredible winning streak.

And someone at NHL.com has the biggest boner for Captain Serious, Jon Toews.

“I’m dropping the Hjalmarson!”

The front page of NHL.com also paid tribute to another Chicago sports legend, Mark Grace.

But let’s be honest.. it doesn’t matter if your team is 1st overall or 30th. You’re gonna get punned.

With Neal out of Dallas, someone’s gotta pick up the pun slack.

With the call-up of Blake Geoffrion, the ability to use this pun for a NHL player has tripled.

Well, at least they stopped saying Price had to carry his weight for the Canadiens.

There must be no Simpsons fans at NHL.com otherwise they would have gone with Max Power.

Great, now they are texting headlines to my phone.

I haven’t seen this many 8′s in hockey headlines since the Flyers played in the early 90′s.

For a second, I thought this was an ad for that awful Rock hockey movie.

T-hanks for nothing.

And the winner of the Pundays Headline of the Week for Cultural Sensitivity Award

Don’t remember what the move Brian’s Song is about? Let me refresh you:

Brian’s Song is a 1971 ABC Movie of the Week that recounts the details of the life of Brian Piccolo, a football player stricken with terminal cancer, and his friendship with Chicago Bears running back teammate and Pro Football Hall of Famer Gale Sayers, who helps him through the difficult struggle.

Yeah, not quite the concept you base fun-loving hockey headline puns off of, is it? 10 minutes later, the NHL apparently agreed.

But let’s be honest… I think we all know the exact reason why the great pun headline writers at NHL.com stepped up their game this past week.

As always, you can check out the Greatest Hits of Pundays by using the Pundays Archive located just below the Royal Half banner at the top of the page.

The Royal Half has been a Los Angeles Kings fan since 1988 and a Half-Season Ticket Holder since 2002. He has seen the following goaltenders play in person for the Los Angeles Kings… Kelly Hrudey, Grant Fuhr, Byron Dafoe, Jamie Storr, Stephane Fiset, Felix Potvin, Cristobal Huet, Roman Cechmanek, Mathieu Garon, Adam Hauser, Jason LaBarbera, Barry Brust, Sean Burke, Dan Cloutier, Yutaka Fukufuji, Jean-Sebastien Aubin, Erik Ersberg, Jonathan Bernier, Jonathan Quick, Ben Scrivens and Martin Jones.You can follow The Royal Half on Twitter @TheRoyalHalf.