Pundays: Encroachment

Every now and then, the pun headline writers at NHL.com will come up with something so original, so amazing, so genius… that all you can really do is read the headline, lean back in your chair and mutter to yourself… “well, I’ll be.”


Why do I feel like this song was in heavy rotation at NHL.com HQ this particular night.

Click here to check out the best and worst NHL.com pun headlines from the past week!!!

While last week the NHL.com pun headlines may have been all about the individual athlete… but this week the writers made those kind of headlines an healthy scratch and instead focused on the team game. And in the process they came up with some great pun headlines.


Coincidentally, Bean Sweep was also the name of Heinz’s disastrous baked bean powered broom.


This truly is an amazing headline but I take issue with the Canadian mainstream hockey media labeling Mike Zigomanis being swapped out for John Mitchell as a true lineup shake-up. Man, I’m glad the Kings don’t play in Canada full time. Imagine what would happen when Kevin Westgarth gets replaced by Trevor Lewis!


Somewhere in here there is a joke about Canucks fans shitting themselves over Luongo’s play this season.


Yes, I get that the Bruins were on a long road trip but any NHL.com headline that has “Kings” in it and doesn’t feature the team with the same name is lazy in my opinion. Unless it refers to Ryan Smyth and Dustin Brown’s blatant drug problem.


Oh man, I am so high.


I can’t imagine the NHLPA and various Union Leaders across the country were happy about this one.
Strike! Strike! Strike!

There were a few headlines this week that did highlight individual players… and also highlighted the incredibly outdated music taste of some of the NHL.com pun headline writers.


Really? The Electric Slide? Remember when that was never cool?
(The first ever reader-submitted Pundays suggestion! Thanks @britlovesmusic!)


Uh huh… uh huh… I see what you did here. I like it.

And of course, the Rick Rypien controversy was finally put to rest by the NHL this week and I have to say, NHL.com… I expected more from you!


Top 3 Rejected Headlines

1. 6 Days to Rypien
Yeah, that’s all I got. But you really don’t need any more than that.

Apparently, there are other professional sports out there besides ice hockey and thanks to recently converted hockey fan Indiana Matt, it turns out that there is a professional sports league called the NFL… and it is totally copying the NHL!





My football friends tell me that Dwayne Bowe’s last name is actually pronounced “Bow” like Bow and Arrow.
Come on NFL.com, act like you been there before.

Now the NFL may have the NHL beat in terms of fan base, yearly profits, national awareness, commercial buying costs, overall merchandising and general superiority in terms of operating a business… but the NHL totally kicks their ass in funny, pun filled headlines. Suck it, NFL!!!


Need I say more?
Oh, I do? Well they are the Hatcher brothers and they were selected into the US Hockey Hall of Fame… 
so they are re-hatch… um… well, actually it doesn’t make much sense, does it?


As always, you can check out the entire Pundays archive here or just use the handy-dandy “Pundays” sidebar on the right.

The Royal Half has been a Los Angeles Kings fan since 1988 and a Half-Season Ticket Holder since 2002. He has seen the following goaltenders play in person for the Los Angeles Kings… Kelly Hrudey, Grant Fuhr, Byron Dafoe, Jamie Storr, Stephane Fiset, Felix Potvin, Cristobal Huet, Roman Cechmanek, Mathieu Garon, Adam Hauser, Jason LaBarbera, Barry Brust, Sean Burke, Dan Cloutier, Yutaka Fukufuji, Jean-Sebastien Aubin, Erik Ersberg, Jonathan Bernier, Jonathan Quick, Ben Scrivens and Martin Jones.You can follow The Royal Half on Twitter @TheRoyalHalf.