Little Green Men

The Los Angeles Kings came out of the Olympic Break strong on Tuesday, beating the Dallas Stars 5-1. On Wednesday, they made 2 small trades to improve their defensive depth and bring some veteran leadership onto this team that is 11-1-1 in its last 13 games. And then on Thursday… the Kings played like total shit.


I had no idea that Nashville’s arena was so fancy.


Kings 2, Nashville Predators 4

For some reason, the Kings cannot figure out how to beat the Nashville Predators. The Kings have lost six straight to the team from the deep south, including two this season. And the best part? The Kings still have to play the Predators two more times. What was the most exciting action during tonight’s game? Why the appearance of Green Man, of course.


“Does my face look green in this?”


“I play for the name on the front, not the name on the back of this jersey!”


Worst. Knockoff of Avatar. Ever.

The whole Green Man thing is getting a bit out of control. If you have no idea what Green Man is, check out this article explaining the cultural phenomena. I think the problem with the Green Man at the Predators game tonight was that he just hung out and watched the game… like a normal fan… just dressed in a green lycra suit. There was no penalty box taunting or dancing… at least any that Fox Sports West HD chose to show. Call me old fashioned… but if you are going to re-enact a cult scene from a cult television comedy show… at least get seats close to the penalty box.


Besides Green Man, the game tonight featured the debut of the 2 newest Kings, Freddie Modin and Jeff Halpern.


“Jeff, you’ve got some pretty great hair there.”
“Foxy, your hair is the best in the biz.”
“Kiss me.”

Both Halpern and Modin did what they were supposed to… be non-eventful. They each played about 10 minutes of defensive hockey, even getting some time on the penalty kill. Overall, the Kings looked out of sorts tonight… they were scrambling left and right, coughing up pucks in the defensive zone and it looks like Kings uber-goalie Jon Quick picked up some bad habits from Martin Brodeur during the Olympics.


I’m pretty sure any goalie coach in the league would disagree with this positioning.


Except maybe the goalie coach for Team Canada.

The Kings also continued their Olympian Roundtable series tonight… or as I like to call it… “Awkward Family Dinners with Bob Miller.”


Brown looks terrified that Bob Miller is going to reach over and hit him.
Sweet shorts by the way, Captain.

During the game against Dallas, there was a lot of talk about the testing of a new type of camera coverage. Well tonight, Fox Sports West HD tried out its new “looks like TMZ was shooting you in the penalty box cam.”


Why can’t a guy go to the penalty box without being bothered by the paparazzi?

Fox Sports West HD made a couple other curious programming choices tonight…


They decided to ignore Coach Murray and instead put Erik Ersberg in net.


I know Fox Sports HD is trying to create new rivalries
but misspelling Colorado is not going to turn the Avalanche against the Kings… yet.


Fox Sports West HD also gave every hockey fan following a team in the middle
of a playoff race exactly what they want in March… Spring Training reports in between periods!


And since this is Hollywood, apparently Gordon Willis is now shooting the pre-game show.


Cinematographer jokes for the win!!!

The Kings head back to Staples Center on Saturday to take on the Montreal Canadiens in a game that will be televised on Hockey Night in Canada. So prepare to hear a lot of talk of how awesome Drew Doughty is. Unfortunately, The Royal Half will miss the Doughty Media Orgy as we will actually be at the game. It’s too bad Michael Cammalleri is injured… because he and Jeff Halpern could have been involved in the best Jewish fight since the last time Dmitriy Salita hit the ring.

The Royal Half has been a Los Angeles Kings fan since 1988 and a Half-Season Ticket Holder since 2002. He has seen the following goaltenders play in person for the Los Angeles Kings… Kelly Hrudey, Grant Fuhr, Byron Dafoe, Jamie Storr, Stephane Fiset, Felix Potvin, Cristobal Huet, Roman Cechmanek, Mathieu Garon, Adam Hauser, Jason LaBarbera, Barry Brust, Sean Burke, Dan Cloutier, Yutaka Fukufuji, Jean-Sebastien Aubin, Erik Ersberg, Jonathan Bernier, Jonathan Quick, Ben Scrivens and Martin Jones.You can follow The Royal Half on Twitter @TheRoyalHalf.