Wow. This one kinda almost needs no words. So here goes a picture:
That’s right… your favorite television motorcycle douchebag is bringing his unique fashion sense directly to the checkbooks of Los Angeles Kings Fans. Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy brought this to my attention early this afternoon… and the news hit us harder than Ryan Smyth being out for a month. This new venture is described as “Kings-specific lifestyle clothing.”
It looks like Christian Audigier took a shit on the NHL catalog. And what exactly is a “Kings-specific lifestyle?” Does this lifestyle include spending 1000 plus dollars a year on season seats only to miss the playoffs for 7 straight years? Does my Kings lifestyle include trading deadline acquisitions that don’t score any goals in the 11 games they play for the Kings? If anything, the Kings lifestyle… is the lifestyle of a loser. What sort of lifestyle would have you buy the jersey of your favorite player only to watch him leave the Kings the next season?
As Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy always says… “Lifestyle specific clothing is also known as clothing (specifically too expensive for your lifestyle).” Me and Half Season Ticket Holder Buddy aren’t “jersey guys.” We wear at the most a Kings hat to each of our games. And you know what? We don’t feel like any less of a passionate Kings fan. I have a handful of Kings t-shirts and sweatshirts and they are mainly worn for lounging around the house. Not for my Kings-specific lifestyle of hitting da clubs up at night.
I don’t want to completely bad mouth Jesse James and his ridiculous line of clothing. After all, he’s a pretty dedicated Kings fan himself and having a celebrity with as big a following as he has (however misguided) be this involved with Kings marketing can only be a positive for the franchise. But maybe the Kings could have considered a few alternative designers that might appeal to a different type of Kings fan. Like the very popular Isaac Mizrahi?
Or maybe even uber-housewares designer Jonathan Adler?
It’s like a reject from the Big Johnson pile.
Even James O’Brien, the NHL’s Official Pun Commissioner would hate this.